Brock Turner was released from jail today. He served three months of a six-month sentence for raping an unconscious young woman at a college party.
As most everyone in the galactic Milky Way knows, he was a swimmer. Not just any swimmer. A former potential Olympic athlete who says that he wasn’t looking for anything but a hook-up. Guess the idea of asking a sober young woman capable of consent wasn’t part of his thought process.
(I’m still sick.)
Parents, this is probably THE best time to have that talk with your college-bound sons and daughters about the intersectionality of sex, drinking, and consent.
I’m a helpful Kanga, so here
are some is the only talking point s you need:
- It does not matter how the other person is dressed, or behaves, or how close he or she is to blacking out. NO means NO. NO does not mean “tie her up,” NO does not mean “if it bleeds, stab it.” If the other person is physically unconscious or otherwise unable to communicate proper consent, do NOT follow through. Go home, take a cold shower, or find a quiet private space in which to cope with the problem on your own.
It is a difficult topic to bring up, but it must be done. Talk to your co-eds about resisting inappropriate advances from professors and TA’s. Tell them it’s a good idea not to be the one approaching the professor or the TA. Your child might have attained the age of consent, but there is a serious imbalance of power in that type of relationship which has the potential to cause emotional and even sometimes physical harm to the younger person.
Do this as soon as possible, and you are at least 100% less likely to look as stupid and deserving of ridicule as Brock Turner’s parents; not to mention the judge who gave him the legal equivalent of a slap on the hand for raping a debilitated young woman whom Brock Turner readily admits he would fail to recognize if he ever met her again.
In all seriousness, do it. This is the number one penultimate opportunity for parents to exert themselves and be a lasting influence in their young adult child’s life. My two oldest kids roll their eyes when I tell them to be sane, safe, and consensual, no matter what it is they are doing or intend on doing. And, frankly, they will never convince me to stop.
Note: the woman in this picture is not Emily Doe, Brock Turner’s victim.